Self-care is a hot topic lately. Society pressures us to "go, go, go" as fast as we can for as long as we can. When we find ourselves overwhelmed and overstimulated, we're reminded to take time for self-care. The idea of self-care for those who are healthy is drastically different from the idea of self-care for those of us with chronic illness. For healthy folks, self-care is a way to relax and recharge from running at a break neck pace day in and day out. For folks with chronic illness, self-care is almost a necessity to be able to function.
For me, self-care can be divided into two categories-self-care that fulfills a necessary function and self-care that is a luxury. The reason I do this is because so often I don't feel well enough to complete basic tasks like laundry, dishes, and showering. These tasks that so many take for granted are so, so difficult for me that I've come to treat them as self-care because I just feel so much better when I can get them accomplished. When I'm feeling down, I try to start with "necessary" self-care like tidying up my room, or cleaning the kitchen. I'm able to boost my mood and knock something off my to-do list...WIN-WIN!!! Some days, I just feel like I need to treat myself, those are the days when self-care consists of a mani/pedi, deep conditioning my hair, or doing an at-home spa day.
Self-care is so important to me because for so long I would put myself last. Literally everything else came first. Back when I was working a traditional job, I would pick up extra shifts, stay late, volunteer for committees, lead in-services, etc. I was also active in my church and sorority alumnae chapter. Whew! Whenever I would find time for myself, it was limited and usually something like a mani/pedi, haircut/color, or a massage. I waited until my toenails were beat up and my poor hands were begging for some TLC after all the hand washing and Purell at work. My hair was more split ends than hair and my back hurt so bad, it was a miracle that I could get through a shift never mind four shifts. I was a hot mess! I spent so much of my life before chronic illness running myself ragged and only allowing minimal time for self-care. I often wonder how different life would be if I had placed more energy into taking care of myself.
Now that I'm essentially forced to make self-care a priority, I've taken some of myself back. This blog is part of my self-care. Writing and sharing my struggles and triumphs makes me feel like I'm contributing something to posterity. Inspiring and encouraging others makes my heart happy. If sharing my missteps can help someone avoid the same struggles I've endured, then I will have fulfilled my purpose. So often we are made to feel guilty about taking care of ourselves, especially if we have families who depend on us or children who need our care and guidance. But like my momma always told me, "You're no good to anyone if you don't take care of yourself."
You can't pour from an empty cup. This is cliche, but it is so true. I am no good to anyone if I am constantly running myself into flares. In order for me to be the best functioning adult I can be, I need to take care of myself. So if that means the dishes sit a little longer than I'd like so that I can take forty-five minutes to slap on a face mask or fifteen minutes to read something that will feed my soul, then sit they will. I will get to them (and the rest of my tasks) when I have recharged. I'll probably even have more motivation to get the rest of the to-do list done when I feel refreshed.
So I will continue to challenge the "go, go, go" and continue to make self-care a priority. It won't make my illness go away, but it will make the hard days easier to fight through.
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